12 FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS ONLY GIRLS WITH LONG HAIR DEAL WITH

12 FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS ONLY GIRLS WITH LONG HAIR DEAL WITH

WORDS by April Davis

WORDS by April Davis

We might not be starving, and we might be acting a little precious, but we think we're justified in saying that us girls with long hair have to deal with some pretty serious shit!

We cop it all, the tedious maintenance, and the costly trips to the hairdressers. You name it; chances are we've got to deal with it. And as much as we adore our long tresses, they can be pretty damn annoying, so we've put together 12 of our 'first world' problems that come with having long hair.

1. My hair tie won't go around my hair three times, but it's too loose when it's only wrapped twice

How many times have you snapped your hair tie in half? Something as simple as throwing your hair in a ponytail become a fight to the death because hair ties aren't made for three twists. But how can your hair be held up by two? Often, it's an unsolvable dilemma that we just have to live with.


2. What makes my hair fall out? Uh duh... Everything!

What's that all over the floor, in the car, on your clothes, stuck in your boyfriends beard? Well your hair of course because wherever you go, it goes. Let's just say if you were ever in a Hansel and Gretel type situation you would come out the victor with your handy hair trail.


3. Damn that wind getting all up in my face

Beware the wind! These three words are golden when you have a heap of hair because it will get everywhere the minute you step outside. You better like the taste of your hair product because you're going to be eating it. It makes walking or doing pretty much anything outdoors impossible, but hey it comes with the territory.


4. Want to blow dry or straighten my hair? I better have about 10 hours to spare

We should seriously get paid for the amount of time it takes to style our hair. No more sleep ins before work because you’re going to be drying, and brushing, and straightening for what will feel like a lifetime, and that's just the start of it. Don't even think about the styling, that's a whole new ballpark.


5. Casually tries to suffocate me in my sleep

Attempted murder we say! And it's a nightly occurrence, if you don't tie it back before bed you'll regret it, it will find it's way into your mouth and word of warning, cats aren't the only ones who get hair balls, people can too! Ewww, let's try to avoid this one by all means possible.


6. Shoots my temperature to a million degrees on a hot day

Air conditioning will become your best friend during Australia's signature heat waves. So much hair is like wearing extra layers of clothing and it will stick the minute it finds a patch of sweat soaked skin, which will be everywhere.


7. Makes it its mission to get caught in absolutely everything

When was the last time you got out of your car hassle free? It’s funny how your hair seems to find it's way into that tiny gap as you slam the door shut, or how it's got a fascination with the zippers on dresses. It loves those places that will yank and pull at it causing you severe pain.


 8. The hairbrush is my worst enemy

Are there any spikes in your hairbrush or is it just balls of hair? You could probably donate the contents of your hairbrush to charities that makes wigs for cancer patients. Not to mention the arm workout you get trying to pull the brush through your matted hair with it getting caught every two seconds. You better over indulge with the conditioner; otherwise that thing isn’t going to budge.


9. Sticky things find it pretty damn attractive

Remember those embarrassing scenes from movies where a girl tries to be cool blowing a bubble with her gum, but it pops and gets stuck in her hair? Don't laugh, it can happen, and it's not fun!


10. Babies and toddlers will mistake it for a toy

For those cute miniature humans your hair is the most fascinating toy ever, they like to grab it, pull it, suck on it and just about anything they can do with their tiny hands and mouths to make you suffer.


11. You can kiss goodbye to riding in that convertible

A topless car is not safe! We repeat it's not safe. In fact it's pretty dangerous territory because you probably won't be able to see a thing or open your mouth from fear of choking.


12. Prepare to spend a fortune at the hairdressers

Finally, the worst part about those precious long locks of yours they cost money. More shampoo, more conditioner, more broken hair ties, you name it. Hairdressers will grow to love you because naturally more hair equals more hair dye or more time that time equals money. So prepare to fork out some major dollars for the care and maintenance of that hair you love so dearly. A piggy banks probably a good investment.

Attention gals with long hair! Have you got any other first world problems to add?



WORDS BY:  April Davis

April is an ambitious, quirky individual currently studying for her bachelor of arts in writing and publishing. She gets a kick out of travelling and cake decorating. Cola flavoured sunny boys make her feel nostalgic and one day she hopes to tick going cage diving with sharks off her bucket list.

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